Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Drinkers for Jesus

Another weekend morning has arrived and a mild ache in the back of my head alerts me that I have had another evening filled with good times and cheap brews. I lurch over the side of my bed and chug the half glass of water residing next to me and roll back over. For the next hour I will contemplate getting up or going back to sleep. Sleep will win. After a thirty minute nap I will wake up and cook breakfast, hit the gym, and go to work for a few hours. All of this will be followed by a movie with friends and cooking dinner before I prepare for a cookout the next day. For the mild nausea and soreness I awoke to I feel I have been pretty productive.

I felt a run down of my average weekend was necessary to preface my article here. Essentially my what I am trying to convey is that even after a late night out with some friends and dealing with a wee bit of a hangover one can be incredibly functional. Sadly the Amazing Grace Mission in Dayton, Tennessee do not agree with me.

Last week I was doing my grocery shopping and picked up a twelve pack of Miller Lite, yes I know most people consider it swill but I find it cool and refreshing. (If anyone at Miller Lite would like more free advertising, feel free to contact me!) After putting away the milk, chicken, and produce I began to load up the beers into the mini fridge in the living room. When I was done I notice a small card laying at the bottom of the box. At first I assumed it was a promo for tickets like many of the beer companies run at the beginning of a sports season and hoped it meant free Colts tickets. Sadly instead of an invite to see Peyton throw some bombs it was a list of the reasons I’m a piece of shit for engaging in a cocktail here and there.

Just in case you have not been lucky enough to receive one of these friendly little pieces of scripture here was the run down. I left a little side commentary just for funsies.

1.I love to vomit. (Keeps me thin)
2.It makes my children respect me. (Practice safe sex and you wont have them to worry about)
3.My wife loves my whiskey breath and beer-bleary eyes. (Yeah she does)
4.Drunkards and saloon keepers make the best citizens. (I am a saloon keeper, technically)
5.It helps me with the safe driving award. (Three this week)
6.I want to encourage juvenile delinquency. (Giving back to the kids)
7.It helps me think more clearly. (Gotta think clearly when stealing a car)
8.It’s my way of saving money. (If you can’t remember spending it, didn’t happen)
9.I hope to live in a “flophouse” on skid row. (Now is the time to buy)
10.It’s my way of obeying God, Who says, “wine is a mocker, strong drink is raging; and whosoever is deceived thereby is not wise.” – Proverbs 20:1
(I am not going to mock the Bible, even I have limits)

Now I can jump on board the “actual alcoholism is a bad thing ship” but literally the card goes on to say even if you just drink some of the time and don’t push the limit you end up a bum on the street asking people for money and reference Skid Row again. I was not aware that the eighties band was so popular with the church going crowd, but I digress. I think what bothers me about the whole thing is that to begin I found it in something I purchased at a grocery store, meaning someone as a distribution center or in Walmart managed to shove something into a box that I will be drinking the contents out of, hygiene issues apply. Secondly, this is just another religious group with a narrow mind spreading a message that if you don’t follow there exact teachings you are garbage. The ten commandments were pretty straightforward on how not to be an asshole, in Bible stories people are constantly sipping wine, it is even served in Catholic Mass for communion but I’m going to hell because I ordered a Mojito (other then the obvious reasons).

I have always had my issues in organized religion when it comes down to the “side projects” of the whole business. I think the key points are all there to make us better people; murder, cheating, stealing, and all the other essentials are pretty obvious. It’s the self righteous groups that spend their time telling everyone else how they shall burn for an eternity are usually the ones with so many skeletons in the closet it resembles “A Nightmare Before Christmas”. I don’t think anyone should be getting all Lindsay Lohanned every night of the week and that alcoholism has destroyed a lot of lives out there. I just don’t want to feel guilty every time I open a sixer up, I just want to taste fresh hops and the triple cold filtered taste (Seriously, Miller, hit me the fuck up).

I think a lot of religious groups do a wonderful job of putting together AA programs and funding outreach centers. There are a lot of great people who give a helping in hand to those who need to get their lives back on track and they should be recognized. I find this is just like telling a teenage kid if you make out with someone they will get pregnant. Filling them with fear works for a while but in the end they resent you for not being honest with them up front and it turns them away from you. If you’d like to get in touch with Amazing Grace Mission the address to write them is P.O. Box 289 Dayton, TN 37321. I’m sure they will keep you from drinking… or thinking for that matter. I’m going to have a glass of milk and call it a day. I’ve got my move in to Skid Row to prepare for this weekend and being my friends are saloon keepers they aren’t very dependable.

Monday, August 24, 2009

A knight of the Republic

It’s about one thirty and my mind is near complete shut down mode. Today was actually a speedy day at work but after a work out, cooking dinner, cleaning up, and reading for a bit my motivation to continue “the hunt” is nill. In a way I am a bit disappointed with myself because I should have taken the time to work on my book this evening and got in touch with the artist for our comic book but could not muster up the energy. I figure I owe it to myself to at least up the blog which I have not done for quite some time. So here we go…

I know typically few people actually go to my page to read the blog and just glance over the transference I set up so it is linked to my Facebook account. If you typically read these little notes you may have noticed within the week I changed my political statues over to Republican. This has caused a few fowl glances and some contemptuous comments from my peers, but to be honest I think the democrat inside of me has just died out.

Before you think I am going to start reading Anne Coulter and join the NRA, I will always take my stance “it’s not about what’s good for the party, but what will better the people” there are a few things I am going to remain loyal to. I will always be pro-choice, being catholic that is definitely a bigger problem then just being a republican but what can I say, that’s just how I feel about the whole thing. Especially because it goes with bringing in religious beliefs into our government which should be outlawed, did I say should, the word I’m looking for happens to be “IS” but whatever. Also, I will always believe in Gay rights, while I may not be a homosexual, I have some friends who are and personally, even if I did not have gay friends, would it truly affect me if to gay men were married in Nebraska? Probably not.

I guess what really started getting the ball rolling is the ever present health care reform. In one of my earlier blogs I stated how I felt about the matter and we are proceeding down a slippery slope here. The United States is in a recession and the government wants companies to start shelling out more money when they can’t even afford current salaries. Here’s to massive layoffs Mr. Obama, cheers! Free healthcare is like one of the many grand ideas in the Obama administration, these things look great on paper, but when its put into practice it is a real shit show.

Now I imagine I will catch a bit of ridicule from some friends that I did in fact vote for President Obama, I think we were all under the impression that we needed change and another old white guy was not going to make that happen. The President is working on changing things but not focusing on what is important. Everybody is trying to play a game of high stakes poker but the Obama administration keeps yelling out, “Go fish!”

As a struggling young man with an artistic degree who is working two jobs to stay alive in the game right now all signs point to I should be in favor of some of these new practices and procedures that are to be put into place. I have worked hard to get where I am today and I do not think just because you want something it should be given to you. America is built on capitalism, work hard and earn more. I am planning on going back for my MBA next year so I can get the corner office with a great insurance package so my family will one day be provided for. Now the plan is to just give that sort of thing away. I ask you, who will work hard for anything if someone will just give it to you? I wouldn’t.

Thursday, July 30, 2009

What do you have on Draught

Earlier this evening the Barack OBama and two other men sat down to have a beer. One Harvard Professor, Henry Louis Gates Jr. and Cambridge police Sgt. Jim Crowley. If you followed the news at all this week it has been huge coverage on “The Beer Summit” being hosted for these two men to sit down and just talk with the President and the Vice President. Basically Professor Gates was locked out of his house and kicked down his own door to regain entry to his home. A neighbor heard the commotion and called the police to alert them of what she assumed was a break in. When Officer Crowley arrived and asked Gates for I.D. he was accused of being racist because Gates was black.

So basically kicking down a door to a house where a break in has been reported does not seem to warrant any investigation. If that is the new procedure, I am heading over to Carmel to furnish my new house. Granted these things always seem to make headlines that racism still exist within our communities and we all need to work together to better society and what not. Thanks to Mark Fuhrman, police will always be scrutinized for being blatant bigots on blacks. (If you know what the is called in grammar please remind me) Granted there are cases of this which happen everyday, especially out in L.A. but I would think that would be standard procedure for that situation.

Regardless I guess this was such a big issue the President of the United States felt he needed to take an afternoon to sit down with these gentleman to bury the hatchet and enjoy a frosty one out on the lawn. Are you out of your fucking mind? Currently we still have troops stationed all over the Middle East still fighting guerilla warfare tactics, a dying economy, and a disease we thought was done spreading is back in full attack mode. Your telling me the U.S. is going to Hell in a hand basket and our fearless leader and drinking a Bud Light with two guys who has a scuffle and are arguing over the race card. WTF mate? I may be mistaken though, only in the fact I am unsure if it was a Bud Light, it is likely it was a Sam Adams, always a good choice.

I voted mostly Republican during the election season but I had faith in President Obama, and cast my vote for him since then I have had a fairly steady decline in my belief he is going to lead us into the promised land. With the half cocked health care bill he is trying to pull and in under a week the cash for clunkers stimulus has been pulled things don’t seem to be running as smoothly as planned. I don’t criticize our current President for the position we are in, things were on a downhill slope long before he took office. I will however hold him accountable in taking necessary steps to get us back on track. Sitting down with two jokers who could not sort out the matter if a robbery was taking place or not is not a duty of Barack Obama. It would not even merit an episode of Dr. Phil.

It is in my hopes that the office of the President begins to get back on track and reinstate America as the superpower it once was. It concerns me a lot of the policies being put in place will take us out of the united republic the United States has always been and will put us into to some sort of socialist nation. Because let’s face it, socialism is just a cute way of saying communism. (In communist Russia, sweater will wear you!) Barack Obama was described as our rock star president. In a sense that is accurate, while he was on his nationwide tour gaining fans he was a sensation. Now that his first album is out in stores, nobodies buying this act any longer.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Moving on up

Typically I do not really write about my personal life on here but with a drastic change about to take place I felt that it was fitting. Tonight is my last night is the residence I have taken for the past 4 ½ months and I will be moving into my new home on Saturday. It got me thinking on how life has taken my on a bit of a journey. That and I finally watched the season finale of Scrubs and that is just an emotional roller coaster in itself. I know not to many people really get a chance to read my blog but I guess this is tailored to those who do.

As I am parting ways from Pat and Andrea I do want to thank them for taking me in when I had no place to go. I honestly appreciate it you giving me a place stay when things feel apart for me. I know some evenings were if not difficult mildly awkward, but then there were nights like that when I just felt the need to wear shoes and by that shoes being the only garment I was wearing. It was a bit longer then we anticipated but the kid is finally out on his own.

Generally with looking at the present I often dive back into my past. It was only a year ago when I was living with Jen and working my sales rep job when we looked into getting a dog. It was at that time I thought I had my life mapped out and began planning the next couple of years of my life. Obviously those plans never came into fruition, on the bright side that plan did include me never catching a STD and that goal is still alive and kicking. Go team!

Now as I am looking down the road at my future I am still uncertain. I am looking forward to moving in with Aaron and hopefully looking to begin what I hope will be my official career. After one major detour I am finally getting my life back on track. If anything was learned over these past couple of months it was that the people in your life are what matters most. I literally feel bi-polar over my success situation and I am constantly frustrated I am not where I thought I would be at this part of the game. One thing I have realized is that if you have the right friends and family some of that stuff just doesn’t matter as much.

The past couple of months have been difficult in the sense I felt like I had reverted back eight steps from graduation. Whenever I post something I feel that I need to make some sort of point. There really isn’t to much of one here except that most times we plan out our entire lives and things often do not go the way we intended. Often times success is not measured in the money we make or the car we drive but truly the people that are apart of our lives. True friendship is worth its weight in gold ( that means if your husky your worth more… I think). If it weren’t for my parents telling me that I was going to get through this time in my life I probably would have went off the deep end. Most of this was just ranting but I just wanted my friends and family (usually the ones that read my blog) how much I appreciated them. Also, can I borrow like 20 bucks, it’s for a good cause.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

The post game now comes with Miranda rights

Obviously I am fired up. This is the first and what I assume will be my only entry in regards to this particular subject; sports. To get it started, I will say being an athlete always has its perks. I never played quarterback or starting forward for any school or outside organization, but I did run track and cross country and I was on the swim team. During those times I had hit a few snags where I should have gotten in trouble or maybe even graded a bit more harshly. But those times were during track season and I was shown a little leniency.

I was no All-star but I was fairly decent in some areas and had a good attitude on the team. Being a part of a winning team and playing a role in the victory is something a lot of people rally behind because the bigger the crowd, the bigger the hero, the bigger the rewards. It is essentially a great business model for rewarding the best employees. My concern is that athletes are now being rewarded with compensation that is beyond monetary value and just the old fashioned hookers and blow; they are given the ability to not follow the law. This may come as a shocker to you but apparently this has been going on for awhile. (Taste the sarcasm)
On March 14th Donte Stallworth killed a 59-year-old man who was coming home from his third shift job. He didn’t shoot him or viciously beat him over an argument on how terrible the Cleveland Browns season went last year. Donte was drunk and smashed into Mario Reys with his Bently, killing him. He will serve a 30 day jail sentence and pay the grieving family a cash settlement. I imagine it will be somewhere in the millions, but when you make five million a year, who’s counting.

What irks me is that one, a thirty day sentence is bullshit for snuffing somebody out, two, it’s another example of the wealthy being untouchable within or justice system, like I have always said, poor people go to jail, rich people go to rehab. I guess what I am getting to is that we need to stop treating athletes like superheroes. Don’t get me wrong. Peyton Manning is a hero. His works with charities and hospitals and he deserves a holiday for being a great role model and a fantastic quarterback. But he is an exception to the role.

Leonard Little of the Rams killed a woman in 1998 during a drunk driving accident and he had an 8-game suspension, I mean what the hell not only was this less then a slap on the wrist, but he played for the Rams… and they are terrible anyway.

I could spend my entire evening typing up professional athletes and there rap sheets but my computer only holds about sixteen gigs and I don’t want to waste it. I know there are a lot of press releases out there with athletes commenting that they do not want to be idolized and worshiped. They plead that they are just regular people with a job to do and their not role models. I give them props for stepping up and admitting that they are just a regular guy with a good jump shot. Let’s face facts. More kids want to be Michael Jordan then Michael Bennet (Senator of Colorado). Personally I wanted to grow up and be Spider-Man.

This is not really a current trend. Ty Cobb beat a man with a telephone unit and in his day and was a wife beater. Back then that was an eight dollar fine. As fans and citizens we have let this get out of control. Really at the point of the O.J. trial we set the standard on how far one can go if they’re famous. We all know he did it, he wrote a book describing how he “would have done it” if it was him. The guy had the guts to write a book describing him killing his ex and her friend after he got off the hook.

We really need to start treating these guys like regular people. I’ll understand if Kobe gets a better table then me in a restaurant, but if he rapes someone I’m friends with, he needs to go to jail. Judges and juries need to stop letting these guys off with fines and house arrest, they are no better then the rest of us, some of them do not even have a high school education but get to drive Ferraris. I think putting them in jail for raping and murder is not too much to ask for. It’s sad when the better action for a sports team is at a nightclub brawl then what they are actually doing in the area. Go Pacers…

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

If your not going to root for the team, get the hell out of the stadium.

The past couple of days have made it another rough news week. General Motors finally declared bankruptcy after rumors circulated for months, three people were found dead in an apartment here in Indianapolis, and the “war” is still going strong in the Middle East. If it was not for the comedic stylings of Conan O’Brien I don’t think I would even turn on my local channels.

The catch twenty-two of it is that if these stories were not depressing and tragic it would not constitute as news. You can’t sell a newspaper with a headline that reads All is Well. It is necessary to keep people informed of everything going on in our nation and our cities and towns, otherwise that would be promoting ignorance and I wouldn’t know what neighborhoods to not walk through after seven in the evening. The major downside is that these stories influence a negative perception of our communities and our country.

There are two things I learned while bartending in college; how to cut a pineapple and never talk about religion or politics with people you want to remain on good terms with. I think I can honestly say I am a very open minded person, if someone has an opinion I don’t see eye to eye on I don’t feel a need to explain why they are wrong and why my beliefs are so much better. That is one of the benefits to being an American that you can believe and preach anything you want (within reason) without fear of prosecution from the government. The only time I falter on this is when I hear people bad mouthing the United States of America.

Beginning at the age of five we all memorized the Pledge of Allegiance, possibly one of the most important things you will ever learn in your life. In reading this I hope you can recite it to yourself, if not please look it up. From that point on in our lives we have sworn an oath to our country that we will honor and respect it. On a day to day basis I consider the state of the union and contemplate on what I think should be done. Badmouthing our country is not one of those strategies.

I’m sure someone is thinking how I do not see the irony that the first amendment gives us the right to say whatever we want and it is in our bill of rights to slander America if we so choose but seriously that is probably not what colonist had in mind. I am sure they also didn’t plan on the right to bare arms to be interpreted for all of Compton to be packing heat as well, but that is just how it is.

Like in most situations morale in the United States falls into the grass is always greener category. If you start talking healthcare people talk about how Universal Healthcare exist everywhere but here, and how great Canada is. Kids in high school bitch about the drinking age and complain they don’t live in Germany so they can drink beer when they are fourteen. Once you get all the “green” advocates going they will tell you America has ruined the environment with pollution and landfills; if you go to other countries you can see how well they have preserved their forests and streams, it’s not all cement and buildings like in the states. Got it, it’s not perfect over here, but it beats the shit out of Somalia.

There are a million little things to nit pick at in the daily life of an American, but they range from things to the cable being out and the price of gas going up to three or four dollars and how expensive that makes it to fill up the SUV. I have never complained that I am hungry because I have not eaten for three days. Things are not perfect in the U.S. and they never will be. No country is perfect, you can take a vacation and everyone will tell you how much they love living in Berlin or New Zealand, from the cobblestone streets to the gorgeous beaches these places lack the one thing we have here and that is the American spirit. In no other country do people have the ambition and perseverance as we do in America. Is our country actually in that bad of shape; for Christ sakes, slavery use to be legal here? Slaves, I mean really; people use to OWN people, I’d say things are getting progressively better from that point.

I think we need to take a long hard look in the mirror and realize how lucky we are to be American citizens. We are in a rut right now, and to keep bitching about it is not going to drag us out of it. During World War II people were donating their pots and pans to help the troops produce metal for bullet casings and other needs. The soldiers here are told the war they are fighting is all “blood for oil” and murder. These are American soldiers risking their lives for your freedom, show some damn respect. This country needs to come together and pull ourselves up to be the superpower of yesteryear. I’m not saying that to complain is unpatriotic, there is a lot of problems that need sorted out in our country. I guess I just wanted to point out that we live in a society that what you put in is what you get back and we need to remember that if we are all working towards a goal to benefit our future things are going to turn out a whole lot better then just sitting on the sidelines talking about what someone else did to screw things up. In the words of Trey Parker; America, fuck yeah.

Monday, June 1, 2009

Here and Now

So today marks my one year mark on living in Indianapolis. Sadly instead of getting a group of my friends together to celebrate my success with champagne, I left work at eight thirty, bought some groceries, and talked to my parents about cosigning a loan to purchase a home because I do not have the funds to do so. Party time! If I knew where I would be when I was eighteen I would have kicked my future self in the ass.

My story is fairly common among people in my age bracket. I am twenty five and not to long ago graduated from college. I make decent money, but definitely not the amount I thought I would be making. I have a job that is agreeable with me, but not the one I have a passion for. Currently I am living check to check with some extra spending money but nothing really attributed to my savings. Perhaps I should have been a rapper. It seems like a lot of people my age are in this situation and are surprised by it. I think we were all under the same idea that if you work hard and go to college they immediately give you a high paying job and a great home and credit lines you will never worry about paying off because your to busy stockpiling cash away into your 401K.

Legitimately all that is a pipe dream. I’m not upset that I don’t have all the luxuries I dreamed I would after dedicating a lot of time and effort into studying and homework assignments. What bugs me as that no one really warns you on the struggling times you have immediately following college, perhaps why that’s why I have so many friends in graduate school. It could be things didn’t used to be this way. I remember a lot of the older guys in my fraternity immediately getting fairly good paying jobs before the diploma was in their hand. All of them had jobs lined up and had a five year plan. Now a lot of us are scrambling to find internships after we have already completed school just for more experience to give us a leg up on the competition.

I think our generation has taken a lot for granted though, like in many instances we expected a lot to be handed to us. If things get tough, ask mom and dad, if that didn’t work; charge it. I don’t speak specifically to my group of friends, for the most part they all came from families that taught us the value of a dollar and be prepared to work hard in your life and you can live well. It is unfortunate how many people just want the world handed to them. It is too often I hear adults my age demanding the good job with benefits because they received an eighty six percent on a test in biology class. I figure my life has really just begun, this is the time where my character will be developed by my will to persevere, and it is what separates me from old kids to a young adult. Sadly I was not aware I would have to sell hemorrhoid treatment over the phone to get to that point.

All and all life after graduation isn’t all that it is cracked up to be, but I don’t know if I would want it any other way. Everyone dreams of getting the big boy job with vacation time and dental included. To be fair, if you walk right into that job without the struggling process you don’t know how lucky you are. I am proud to say for a year I have busted my ass off in getting by and trying to become a better person. I took a job that honestly forced me to have a great sense of humor about myself or I would have hit depression. My three year relationship with my girlfriend ended and I have been living in my friends’ spare bedroom for three months while I paid the lease on my old apartment my ex still lived in. Most people would chalk this up to a pretty lousy year. But that is what Living the Dream is all about; getting there. The tough times you got through make the best stories. A lot of people tell me it’s hard out there to find a good job due to our sagging economy and to just be happy I’m working. I’m not going to have an excuse when I’m thirty because I don’t have the career I wanted. I’m going to tell the story how I never gave up. I’m going to tell a story how I made the best of life and got the job that was right for me. Followed by how I worked in a hemorrhoid clinic for three months…

Friday, May 8, 2009

A guy walks into a cinder block...

A couple of weeks ago I tore my leg open pretty bad. I sliced it up against a cinder block and cut it down to the bone. As you can imagine this hurt like hell and I needed medical attention. The first thought in my head however was not about where the closest hospital was but that I lacked medical insurance and therefore could not afford treatment. It’s been two weeks and my leg is still bleeding a bit, I have an awkward limp, and it stings a tad. I have seen a doctor at the medical clinic my father works at and they put me on antibiotics to prevent infection. Before I get started I want to point out that I am not in favor of universal health care. The issue is America heads a lot of the new procedures and drugs that keep us living longer and able to fight diseases that would have killed us twenty years ago. This is because the health care industry is very profitable and people invest a lot of money into it. If it became government sanctioned and did not produce the cash flow it has been, funding would be lost and medical breakthroughs would end all together. To keep advancing this area we are just going to have to realize that it is a business. But on another level, lets evaluate what we are really paying for.

So here’s the thing, I needed stitches, pretty badly. I could not handle a four hundred dollar medical bill right now, that is almost half a pay check for me and rent is due. The thing is, all that I needed done is to get stitches. Now it only cost a tailor about twenty bucks to do the whole suit so four hundred on the leg seems a bit high. I would have gladly popped a Vicodin ($2, those are street prices I hear), hired a seamstress ($25) , and bought some antiseptic and gauze ($10). So the work I needed done about thirty seven dollars, hell I would have thrown down fifty to add a tip. Of course that is a bit of an exaggeration but I doubt something as simple as stitching up a leg should cost so much. If my appendix ruptured I could see having a large bill or if I was getting x-ray work done, I could see paying a hefty sum, but not for something like that.

I understand that hospitals need to make a lot of money for staffing and training on new procedures. To be honest small local hospitals are not doing liver transplants and triple bypasses so they need to receive income from somewhere and something which is a low cost to them i.e. stitches, putting a hefty price tag on it will generate good revenue is a good plan, but it makes healthcare unaffordable when people need it.

Granted a survived my ordeal and will walk away with a pretty nasty scar to commemorate the event, but there are a lot of people who probably would not have taken all the precautions I have by disinfecting the area daily, keeping it covered, and taking antibiotics for it. These are the types who will get an infection and will need to seek serious treatment and even may need to have the area be amputated. Then this person who could not afford the four hundred dollar emergency treatment will default on paying back the hospital the several thousand dollar emergency treatment which will cause for the hospital to find a way to make money back by raising it’s cost on other treatments. A vicious circle indeed. I guess what I am looking for is a way to make health care affordable, or a job with good insurance so it’s not my problem. Go capitalism.

Sunday, April 12, 2009

430 Friends and Counting:

If you’re currently reading my blog entries I’ll assume you have access to the internet. It’s also a safe bet to say if you have internet access you are a member of The Facebook. If you’re like me you probably have at least a few people that are listed as “friends” you have either never met or haven’t spoken to in several years. Personally I rarely search someone out to add as a friend. Typically if I am introduced to someone I don’t even think about adding them on to my friends list but eventually I receive an invite or suggestion to be friends with this person and gladly accept. When Facebook was first launched publicly you had to be a college student to use it and provide your college e-mail. It has since expanded and even fictional characters have their own profiles. I am friends with God and Professor Xavier of the X-Men. I have always found the Facebook to be something to entertain myself with, either funny wall post between friends, an irrational “status” message, or putting photos of crazy evenings up. Things have sadly changed.

Granted Facebook pretty much lets you post whatever you are thinking and as long as it is not pornography almost any picture you can imagine, trust me, I have several that I would not want scrapbooked. With this knowledge employers started looking at potential hires and current employees personal pages; after all, it is a public forum. This allows the employer to see their staff without the confines of a suit and in an office atmosphere. Once most companies started feverishly monitoring Facebook and MySpace web sites members needed to drastically alter there web pages. The profile picture of one doing a three story beer bong was replaced with special moment with their significant other and their new puppy. “Hungover from a fourteen hour drinking binge” status updates were switched to “enjoying coffee with friends”. I have several friends who once upon time held legendary Facebook profile pages who have began careers now and have had to fine tune it into a secondary resume.

I guess I just think it is a disappointment that something that was once very personal and an extension of ones personality has needed to become another disguise to convince ones superiors that they are just as professional in their personal life as in the workplace. Recently I have deleted several pictures that I was “tagged” in by friends. Granted these pictures were morally objected but I view my Facebook page as a time capsule for the life I have been living. It is a timeline of good times I have had with my friends and the relationships I have partaken in. Now even when I post a quick update for my thoughts it is something that can be scrutinized by hundreds of potential employers. It is discerning that we are given freedom of speech but in the end if someone doesn’t like what you said it is going to cost you. I am hoping in time there will be something that can take the place of Facebook allowing you to share your actual thoughts and ideas without endangering your career. As for me I am going to delete some more photos and add some quotes from movies that are supposed classics, and then put all of the photos of that Tijuana donkey show in a shoebox where they supposedly belong.

Friday, April 3, 2009

If You’ve Got Lung Cancer Hold One of Those Sticks Up!!!!

So it’s that special time of year again, the seasons change, the days get longer, and the smokers find something to bitch about. The topic of the season is the taxes going up on cigarettes increasing the average cost per pack up by 62 cents. A lot of people are up in arms about this because a tax increase during this recession seems unreasonable. While the subculture known as smokers cries in their beers (another luxury item) let’s look at the facts. Our economy is in the shitter and raising taxes on services would be bullshit. Cigarettes are not a service; they are an item that is unnecessary for daily life. Now every time I go shopping lately I make note of the items that I typically buy and compare the change in prices over a months span. I also compare the brand to its generic counterpart. On several food items I have watched them climb steadily over the past few months, not to an extravagant difference but about 75 cents higher then previously. There are other items however that have gone down by about two dollars, Wal-Mart truly is rolling back those prices.

Here is my point, I am not rallying a group of people to burn down the Nabisco corporation because my ‘Nilla Wafers have become more costly. The news is not reporting day and night that frozen chicken dropped by two dollars. It always comes back to the same group of people complaining how they are ostracized because they suffer from an addiction they cannot control. It’s not like this is a thirty-five percent increase on tap water or an oxygen tax. This is a frivolous expense, if you can afford to buy premium gasoline maybe you shouldn’t by the Porsche. Go figure Americans being upset they cannot live outside of their means.

Along with an increase in tobacco taxes, my good friend alcohol is receiving the same treatment. The same thing happened when I was in college, armed with my trusty fake I.D. I was buying a case of high-class heaven known as Keystone Light. As I was being rung up at the counter the toothless bastard who worked there told me to buy up now because they were raising the price on all beer. He was correct, next weekend the standard ten dollar case was skyrocketed to thirteen dollars. Now I am a man who likes a cold beer after a long day, I don’t drink a case in a day, let alone a week at the ripe old age of twenty five, it is not expensive because I do it in moderation. Not only is that good for my wallet but I am sure my liver is appreciative as well.

So there it is, my one vice (one of many) went up by a fairly drastic amount, I was also living in a college town, and the topic came up often on how it was bullshit we were paying thirteen bucks for piss water but we didn’t have another option so we sucked it up and spent the extra dough. For an extra sixty two cents I think the smoker nation really needs to just bite the bullet on this one. This isn’t about government intervening in the consumer market, inflation occurs to many products so it was only a matter of time before tobacco was affected as well.

Before a shit ton of smokers try to burn a giant novelty cigarette in my yard as an effigy, I get it, it is very hard to quit smoking, it’s addictive and cost a lot of money to pursue a habit you don’t even like. The thing is, no one forces you to smoke, coffee use to cost a nickel and we all know that is not the case anymore, get over it. Vices are expensive, drinking, smoking, gambling, and depending on your geographic location; hookers. That is what makes them vices, they are shit you don’t need and typically over indulge in. Now if you catch me on the news bitching about how Bud Light is twenty cents more a can I give you permission to punch me in the face. Until that day lets give it a rest and keep bitching about gasoline and stocks.

Monday, March 30, 2009

The Economy Rehab Letter

Dear Economy,

What the hell? What are you doing with your life. You sure have been a real disappointment to us lately. You have been on a destructive path for so long we forgot what you used to be like. We know it is not all your fault, people have taken advantage of you, and that was wrong. Remember when those lender groups had been abusing you and you didn’t know what to do. Finally you had the courage to tell us and we bailed you out of a bad situation. We thought everything was finally over. We had no idea the automotive groups were doing the same thing. I can’t believe we overlooked it for so long, I mean really an H3, how could they think they would get away with that. I suppose it was only a matter of time until they got caught, but the damage had already been done. We miss you so much and just want you to get better. We are really trying to take better care of you and want to stop being so reckless. I guess it is easy to blame all the big corporations and mark them as bad guys but we haven’t made this any easier. All the credit debt we have put you through, all those jobs we outsourced, we sure have let you down. I know it seems like a tease with the chatter of a stimulus package a second time around to get things going. It won’t be like last time, we really have put some thought into this and it’s possible things will work out this time. I know the new head of the household has already faltered on a few issues but he is trying, hopefully he will be able to take care of you better then the last one. If not we are really going to be in trouble. So please, get better, we really miss you around here. We didn’t mean to shout earlier, you have hurt us as much as we have hurt you and we think we could all work this out together. So chin up, we will get through this and be better for it.



The Subway Guy

You hear a lot of things about how poorly the employees in Wal-mart stores are paid and how they have no benefits, pretty much working at Wal-mart demeans you as a person because they do such a piss poor job of treating their employees like people. I assume if your working at the Subway located in the Wal-mart store life is a bit worse. I went in today to get a sandwich from Subway located within My Super Wal-mart mega store and had quite the eventful day. Upon being greeted by my sandwich artist I picked up on the fact this guy had the smile of a 15th century British prostitute. Literally these teeth were going in angles beyond comprehension. This was his redeeming quality to what ensued.

I tell him my order, “Foot long ham on white with pepper jack cheese”, simple enough. He was cleaning up the area with some chemicals and washed his hands after being reminded by another co-worker then through the plastic gloves on. He stared blankly at me for a moment and inquired the type of bread I wanted. “White bread, please”, I reminded him. He shook his head pulled the baguette out. “What kind of meat did you want “ he asked. I told him ham and he started on the sandwich. A few seconds later he asked me if I asked for cheese, apparently my initial order did not make it through.

Once the hard part was over he asked about toasting it and I asked for it to be microwaved. He was stunned, the manager was standing next to him and he informed her of our predicament. “He wants it microwaved” said the man who had suffered a curb job. “Then stick it in the microwave “ said the manager. He responded by simply saying “oh”. At this point he starts to move his cleaning supplies around, the counter scrub and some chemicals. The manager yells at him and tells him to wash his hands again now that he is shellacked with bleach and he is handling my food. After a roll of the eyes our boy here washes up. He apologizes to me for what I assume is the fact he was three minutes out from poisoning. Then he adds in “they get on me bout everything here, glad I’m bout done with this place.

This guy was not sorry for the fact he was about to add some windex and bleach to my sandwich but rather his boss had made this a slow fuck in the world of sandwich making for making him wash up. He tried to liven up the rest of the ordeal by speaking in different accents looking for a laugh but amateur night at the Apollo was closed. Finally I paid and got the hell out of there. I guess this raises the question is there even inbreeding in Indiana or did this guy have to move here. Secondly, when this guy got hired on to work at Subway, did the supervisor sleep soundly that night or realize it’s only a matter of time before health violations close this mother down. I understand there are positions to fill out there and everyone needs a job, with the un-employment rate at what it is, there had to be a candidate better then this guy. I just want to meet the other guy they had it narrowed down to.